An angry chef speaking up
Here is a list of things that happend or i have to deal with at work that make me wanna forget that 2nd degree murder is illegal.
1. customers who order things off of the menu. why the hell is this so popular in north america? you’re alergic to nuts? well then you can have something on the menu that doesn’t have nuts in them. you don’t like the tast of garlic well there are a couple menu item for just your type. you want some wasabi on that dish of french food? sigh
2. waiters who make mistakes. now this is a bit arrogant of me because i’m not perfect. but when waiter mess up an order or drop a plate and i have to redo it… oooohhhh my god. i’m going to die
3. dumb as a door knob hostess’. i hate restaurants who hire peple becuase they’re a pretty face. hire people who know what they are doing. like tonite at work. we got slammed because a hostess over booked. she didn’t want to say no to a customer on the phone and continued to let pepole make reservations for 8 pm. iis it difficult to say "may i suggest an earlier or later seating?". i dunno i’ve never been a host but it seem pretty simple to me. that’s backed by the opinion of the entire wait staff at the restaurant.
4. peple who order steak well done… oooohhhh my god. get over your unrational squeemish attitude towards pink meat. the only way i’d eat a well done piece of meat is at gun point of a person threatening to kill me otherwise
5. people who don’t clean after themselves. this is kinda wierd because i hate cleaning at home but at work if a frigde or a deep fryer is dirty i just wanna go ballistic on who ever slacked off and didn’t clean. especially deep fryers. unless you’ve cleaned one you’ll never understand.
6. waiters who sask for a sprig of mint or some berries on every single dessert. it doesn’t make it look better. it takes away from the actual dessert. why not accentuate the natural apperace of the dessert. it’s like the whole contrasting thing. if it looks to plain it’s not good enough for north america. e need wild and crazy colors.
7. sweating my balls off. the amount i sweat would make a person who likes well done steak wanna throw up. i can ring out my chef whites. it’s not that it’s disgusting but it’s just unconfortable to have to readjust a schaffing uniform and wipe your brow constantly.
8. when someone other than me uses my knife. i’m very protective of my knife. to date i’m the only one who properly maintains a knife. no wonder henckles are so popular. people can’t maintain an edge so they buy a super expensive knife. when ever i see someone use my knife it’s always been abused. i no longer trust anyone unless under cloe supervision.
9. people who joke around. i don’t ike to talk at work. i’m a quiet guy. i hate those people who don’t like silence. they turn on a radio or make jokes all night long to fill in the silence. drives me nuts.
10. little punks who think they know buyt really don’t. please don’t ever give me in accurate advice. i’m going to have zero respect for anyhting you say from that point on. outside of a kitchen you can bullshit all you want but in a kitchen if you don’t know then keep your mouth shut.
11. crappy equipment. nothing will make you wanna curse more than to have to cook with a dirty plugged up gas range or a fridge that leaks, or a freezer that won’t freeze, or a blender with a dull blade. if i find the people who inveted all these crappy brands of equipment i will unleash years of pent up frustation which will be a wrath so glorious that you will laugh and cry at the same time.
well that’s all i can think of for now. if i ever think of any more i’ll post em. if you work in the restaurant industry or or ahve annoying things that you deal with in other industries lemme know
chef koo
Comments
Can someone please tell me if this is for real? Some of the postings on this site are quite humorous so I get alerts on my cell phone/email. I usually read new postings when I’m taking a morning grumpy before work. Sometimes I think about posting but I’m so overwhelmed with days that never seem to end, which eventually turn into weeks that never end, that I am unable to find the time to rant and rave about nonsense that any seasoned cook knows full comes with the territory of the job… but this.. THIS posting by Chef Koo has really rubbed me the wrong way and I’ve been trying to find a moment to comment…
Dude, get over yourself. You have to be one of those high-maintenance C.I.A grads that thinks the world is supposed to cater to your every need, cuz this posting makes you sound like a rookie with some food knowledge but no real-time experience. I’m suprised you actually have balls to chafe.
1. French food is overrated and wasabi is hit or miss. If someone wants to eat them together, who gives a shit. They probably have better ideas about food than you do if they’re willing to try new stuff.
2. Okay, I agree… It’s annoying, but it happens. Much the same way as misfires do.
3. Getting slammed pays your salary and affords you a line full of cooks to mistreat and blame for your shortcomings. And, as shallow as it seems, I don’t wanna deal with an ugly waitress or hostess. Neither do the people who pay to eat your food. That’s how it is.
4. It’s their meat and they’re paying unreasonable and ridiculous amounts of money for you to cook it to their preferred temp. Throw that bitch under the broiler or on the grill and get back to it later.
5. I concur.
6. Outta curiosity, I wonder where the hell you pulled this from. People eat with their eyes. presentation is everything. You should know this, Chef.
7. Really.. cover up. I can see your vah-jay.
8. Legit.
9. I promise you that your little attitude in no way whatsoever can even compare to my extreme levels of misanthropy. I deal with it. If you can’t then you are in the wrong business.
10. Alienation and projection. You’re a fucking retard.
11. My balls have more wrath than you. You’re probably one of those little guys who likes to yell alot and scare people by throwing plates and shit, huh?
Ps. Your vocabulary needs improvement and your spelling is sub-par. Please never post again. I hate you.
Is there a perfect restaurant job? Is there a perfectly run restaurant? Absofrigginlutely not. If there was, you’d all be working there, I’d be your chef, and this site wouldn’t exist. Half the FOH managers in this city haven’t a clue how to run the floor, write a schedule, talk to tables etc…the ones that do, well they work with the other half and that’s just the way it goes. Servers in every place I’ve ever worked at in Boston, and NYC all have a suggestion on how to make places run more smoothly and effectively…but you’re also servers. No offense, but if you want your place to run the way you’d like, get a management job and change it yourself. Most of you work in the industry because it’s quick cash (and if you work in a half decent place you’re taking home more a year than we are) and you can BS with people enough so you can make that $$, the rest of you are lifers and well hey, sucks for you. I’ve been a chef 14 years, that’s 14 years of servers bitching, about customers, the kitchen, the chefs, the management. It’s a way of life, get used to it. I think my job’s pretty sweet, good pay, good food, and yes, I work with my fair share of dumbasses but like I said that’s the way it is. Don’t like it? Work a 9 to 5 in a cubicle and tell me how much fun that is. TPS reports are a pain in the ass. You all want to know the best places to work and where the best money is?? The ones that aren’t hiring.